I was crying the other night for no particular reason. I just get to that point when I need a release and I let the tears flow (or some sappy Hallmark commercial comes on and darn it, there I go bawling like a baby). Actually, I cry more now that I am older than when I was a young adult. I’m tearing up just writing this.
Why do I cry? At this time of my life I would venture to say it is more hormonal. I cry at the drop of a hat (and apparently, I dropped a hat once and it made me cry). It was a nice brim hat that blew off my head and into traffic and was crushed. I miss that hat (Where is my Kleenex when I need it?). It was so sharp! One minute I am happy and laughing and before you could blink your eye, I start crying. Of course as things would be, it happens at the most awkward time. You have to be strong if you decide to make a spectacle of yourself.
Normally, I would cry at loss (loss of a loved one really gets me going), a sad movie like The Notebook, or when I balance my checkbook (Where does the money go?). Now it doesn’t matter what I am doing or saying, the tears are determined to flow. Note to self to invest in paper products since I tend to go through them like water. It doesn’t stop there. I cry at weddings, births, family reunions (though there are several different factors involved in this one) and other happy occasions.
Basically I love to cry. I mean I started as a baby. It worked. I got the attention I needed. People catered to me, so I kept it up throughout childhood. I used this tool throughout life (I know this sounds like a bit of scheming was involved (wink)). I cried to get out of things (read: tickets and let me tell you that works very well), letting go of someone (read: breaking up with a guy I wasn’t into, but did not want to hurt his feelings), to deal with stress, and whenever I have to make a tough decision that affects the outcome of my life. I find myself doing a lot of reflective crying. What I mean by this is whenever I reflect on my life (which I do often for it is very cathartic) I shed tears because I am so caught up in my emotions that I begin to cry.
Crying gets a bad rap. We think of someone crying as an emotional wreck or a weak individual, but that is so far from the truth. Well, not too far in some cases…but I digress. We need to deal with the emotions we feel. We need to release them and process them. A lot of people hold everything inside and never take the time to see how it affects them until the day the darn dam bursts (read: flood warning).
Crying can soothe our minds, it can reduce stress, and it can lead to improving your mood. We shouldn’t try to find ways to avoid it (Are you listening men? No more avoiding the crying game guys.), but rather accept it as part of our emotional makeup, deal with it, utilize it and move on.
People spend too much time holding everything in and letting the stress fester like an open sore, instead of dealing with the issue at hand at the moment it happens. Let it all out (No, really let it all out!), bust out a box of Kleenex, unplug the phone, turn off the television and sob baby, sob. You may be surprised how you feel afterwards.
As for me, I have to leave now to find a new replacement for an old friend I recently lost. Ah, the memories of my wide brim hat are making me tear up again, as is the Roy Orbison song Crying that is playing on my I-pod. I must calm down, breathe, and get over this…eventually.
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