Rumor:  She left him for another man.

Actual truth:  She moved in with her father to take care of him during a recent illness.

 

Rumor:  She was seen all over town spending money everywhere she went.

Actual truth:  She had to run to multiple places to purchase the necessary products that were needed for her project.

 

Rumor:  She cannot hold down a job.

Actual truth:  She works short-term assignments to make more time available so she can take care of her child’s special needs.

 

There are a million rumors out there and they grow in leaps and bounds.  People are drawn to gossip and love to spread it.  Why do we easily believe the worst about someone instead of seeing the good deep down inside?  Why do we want to see someone fall and then pick themselves up?

 

Is society insecure as a whole that they cannot think better of themselves until they see someone fall in disgrace?  Does the thought of knowing everyone else’s business make you salivate?  Do you get a kick out of someone else’s pain?

 

Well, if you answered yes to any of these, then I have a little advice for you.  Grow UP and move on!  It is none of our business!  My life is too hectic to dwell on someone else’s assumed “problems or issues”.   Do not get me wrong I am truly concerned for others, but I just do not like talking about them when they are not there to defend themselves.  I like to go to the source in order to answer any question I may have.

 

Why do we feel that we have the right to know everyone else’s business?  I would like to say that if you feel this way, then I suggest you, yourself should gear up because that would include others knowing your business as well.  Remember what is good for one is good for all if we follow that objective.

 

There are people out there that are hungry to hear about others for no other reason than to serve their assertion that they are better than those who are being gossiped about.  Well, I do not want to burst your bubble, but since you are deluded, I will.  You are doing this for your own self-serving needs not out of concern for others; therefore the issues lies deep rooted in your psyche not the person you are maligning.

 

Another point that I would like to address is whatever happened to respecting someone else’s right to privacy?  We are blurring the lines between public knowledge and privacy and some feel they have a right to know everything.   Take our celebrities for example.  People spend money to buy the gossip magazines or tune in to the entertainment shows to get the latest scoop of gossip on any celebrity who is in the spotlight at the moment.  Yes, I know that they are famous, but they deserve privacy as well.  They should not be excluded just because they are famous.  They, after all, make up our society along with everyone else.  Yet, because of their careers they are in the public eye.  Part of their job description is to participate in publicity and promotion of their product.  Interviews and attending festivities pertaining to their projects are forms of promotion.  This is for public attention.  However, the line needs to be drawn whenever the attention is not a result of public promotion.  When it centers on their family and their vacation times, then it is wrong to follow them or harangue them.  We do not need to know their private business and gossip about whomever they date or marry, nor have anything to do with harassing their children.  I know people love to speculate and feel that if someone is in the public eye that this is a right of the public to pursue the celebrity and to engage in gossip about them, but it is not.

 

When we chase after people for our own curiosity, or when we spread gossip for our own gain, we then are in the wrong.  We are too caught up in a world in which we seek to meet our own needs regardless of whoever may be caught in the way of that goal.  Turn the tables and think about how you would react if this happened to you.  Who are we to judge someone else when they fall from grace and make a mistake?  Should our own dirty laundry be exposed?

 

I know we all tend to be curious and that curiosity can spark some amazing discoveries in this life; however, we need to use it on things that can push us further along for the good of one another and society in general.  Gossip is malicious.  It rarely spreads good news.  Trust me I have been in many workplaces and whenever people gossip they tend to focus on the negative aspects, not the positive aspects, of someone.

 

Take stock of yourself and look in the mirror.  Is this who you want to be defined as?  Do you want to be remembered for your acts of kindness or your ability to spread gossip about someone?  Do you want friends or people who are fake and just there to get the story and nothing else?

 

I want to know the person behind the façade and see for myself if they are a friend or not.  I want to look in the mirror and be able to identify who I am.  To know that I chose character before vanity, that I chose to be selfless instead of self-serving, and that I truly stood as a friend not a foe.

 

I am not trying to preach, but rather to get you to think about your actions and the motivations behind them.  We live in a world in which kindness; generosity and genuine love are dying every day.  I want to help restore those traits and start to chisel away at the negative approach that seems to be so prevalent today.  Go to that person you are claiming to be concerned about and talk to them directly.  Communicate, do not speculate or propagate.  Create a new approach and put this need to gossip to rest once and for all.

 

The “Extra extra read all about it” phrase should be passé.  Rather, it should be “Hello, let me introduce myself” to that person and see where that leads instead.  Be motivated for finding the good in people not the bad.  Spread love for one another, not hate.