Do you remember as a child playing the game hide and seek?  One person was “it” and the object of the game was for everyone to hide and then the person who was “it” would search for you.  Some of us were quite clever in our choice of hiding (I could virtually go hours before being found), and some were quite simple in their selection and were most likely found first.

We start this game as kids gathered together and it is played in fun.  Being little it is a game that can continue for several hours before we decide enough is enough and quit.  I think this is a game we continue to play throughout our lives.  It ranges from four different stages and the intent changes the game and its meaning.

Like I just mentioned we start this game as a kid (first stage playing with our peers), but it evolves the older we get.  As teenagers we still play this game, but the objective is different; thus changing the end result.

For example, when we get a little older (read: teenagers) we still play this game but with a little different set of rules (the 2^nd stage playing with our parents).  Our objective here is to seek money from mom and dad (for all of our important necessities:  cell phones, jeans and whatever we can demand (I mean ask) for.), but they are in control and hide the money from us.  We aim to be clever, but they still have the upper hand; thus we have to adjust to their rules.  We are the proverbial “it” and nine times out of ten we lose the game.  The one time we win is either by our parents being generous or our ability to successfully play one parent against the other.  We test out this game to see if our “wants” can be met, not our needs.

We continue on through adulthood and still play this game.  It now is played out in friendships or relationships in general (the third stage).  It becomes a bargaining tool and depending on the goal (prize), it can become quite controlling in these relationships.  It becomes more of an “I’ll give you this, if you do that for me” scenario.  Taking the game to this level and out of context removes the element of fun and interjects the element of seeking one’s own needs regardless of what the other party wants.  It no longer remains a game, but rather becomes a weapon to wield over one another.  When both parties refuse to budge, it can also lead to ending relationships in which no one is the winner.  As adults, we have to determine new rules together in which both parties can participate and find rewards.  It needs to be mutual; thus moving from your own wants and needs, to now to the needs of everyone involved.  It requires maturity and strength and if these principles can be applied, it should contain the elements of compromise and respect, but most of all good will to one another.

The fourth and final stage of the game is now played only with yourself, but you do not realize that.  You are older now and your memory begins to fade.  Now you search for things that are misplaced and it can become quite frustrating.  You tear the place apart looking for that lost item.  A lot of choice words can be uttered, as well as, panic forming while you franticly search for that lost item.  You only realize the depth of this, when one day you open your freezer and find an object (glasses or keys for example) that was never meant to be there.  Yes, you are red-faced, but confused as well.  You begin to question yourself.  Is this a one time occurrence or is this the beginning of something more serious?  Don’t worry we all get flustered and interrupted in life’s daily activities and most likely this is a sign of that.  However, if this is a constant issue, I would strongly recommend that you look into it.

I am all for games and for the enjoyment gained during this.  However, let’s think back once again to when we were little.  It was a game and nothing more.  It did not define us, nor did we let it get out of control.  We gathered together to play and when the game ended we waved goodbye and went home.

Life can be challenging and yes, present many obstacles, but we need to focus on ways to overcome our obstacles and face them head on.  Life should not be taken too seriously that we forget to have fun.  Fun with one another and fun with ourselves.  We do go through all of these stages, but it is how we view and play the game that determines how successful or unsuccessful we can be.  We can look at it as just a game or we can put too much thought into the process and it becomes a directive for our life.

I played the game as a child and loved it.  I played the game in relationships and got much of out it.  My intent was never to be in control, but to learn how to give and take instead.  It taught me to think of others and that in life we have to compromise sometimes for the benefit of our relationships and to allow them to grow and prosper.  I just entered the final stage of the game and it is quite a mind game.  As I get older, I get more distracted and tend to misplace things every now and then.  I used to “freak” out but now take it in stride and calmly try to retrieve my steps.  I am still on solid ground and plan to stay that way for some time.

Enjoy the game no matter the level.  Play it honestly.  Play it with all your heart.  Do not play with demands, but rather with a light heart and a flair for fun.  Enjoy the game and the time spent with those you share it with.  I am going to count to ten…quick go hide.